Aimless Love

This morning as I walked along the lakeshore, 
I fell in love with a wren 
and later in the day with a mouse 
the cat had dropped under the dining room table.

In the shadows of an autumn evening, 
I fell for a seamstress 
still at her machine in the tailor’s window, 
and later for a bowl of broth, 
steam rising like smoke from a naval battle. 

This is the best kind of love, I thought, 
without recompense, without gifts, 
or unkind words, without suspicion, 
or silence on the telephone. 

The love of the chestnut, 
the jazz cap and one hand on the wheel.

No lust, no slam of the door— 
the love of the miniature orange tree, 
the clean white shirt, the hot evening shower, 
the highway that cuts across Florida.

No waiting, no huffiness, or rancor— 
just a twinge every now and then

for the wren who had built her nest 
on a low branch overhanging the water 
and for the dead mouse, 
still dressed in its light brown suit. 

But my heart is always propped up 
in a field on its tripod, 
ready for the next arrow. 

After I carried the mouse by the tail 
to a pile of leaves in the woods, 
I found myself standing at the bathroom sink 
gazing down affectionately at the soap, 

so patient and soluble, 
so at home in its pale green soap dish. 
I could feel myself falling again 
as I felt its turning in my wet hands 
and caught the scent of lavender and stone.

 

Billy Collins

THE JOURNEY

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice--
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug

at your ankles.

"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do--
determined to save
the only life you could save.

MARY OLIVER

I Have Dreamed of You So Much

I have dreamed of you so much that you are no longer real.
Is there still time for me to reach your breathing body, to kiss your mouth and make
your dear voice come alive again?

I have dreamed of you so much that my arms, grown used to being crossed on my
chest as I hugged your shadow, would perhaps not bend to the shape of your body.
For faced with the real form of what has haunted me and governed me for so many
days and years, I would surely become a shadow.

O scales of feeling.

I have dreamed of you so much that surely there is no more time for me to wake up. 
I sleep on my feet prey to all the forms of life and love, and you, the only one who
counts for me today, I can no more touch your face and lips than touch the lips and
face of some passerby.

I have dreamed of you so much, have walked so much, talked so much, slept so much
with your phantom, that perhaps the only thing left for me is to become a phantom
among phantoms, a shadow a hundred times more shadow than the shadow the
moves and goes on moving, brightly, over the sundial of your life. 

Robert Desnos

 

A WALK

My eyes already touch the sunny hill,

going far beyond the road I have begun,

So we are grasped by what we cannot grasp;

It has an inner light, even from a distance-

and changes us, even if we do not reach it,

into something else, which, hardly sensing it,

we already are;

a gesture waves us on answering our own wave . . .

but what we feel is the wind in our faces.

 

 

-Rainer Maria Rilke